moved to move someone

We are creative beings. Some more than others.
I think about creating more than I create.
...held back by laziness and fear.
I need more will power and determination.

Oh sweet fire of my heart, burn brighter.
and You, reader:You were created to move someone. You were created to move--in creativity.

- Victoria

bouncinglights.drake

sitting in my casa with a blue screened TV that I can't get to play Parks and Rec.I gave up easily. I like music better anyways.

dinner menu: Mint green tea. 

Drake. Headlines. other music of his too. 

sometimes Drake makes me feel empowered. like I could be a female boxer.completely badass. 

So now my Christmas tree lights are bouncing off the wall or maybe it's just my tired eyes. 

later days, 

victoria

tonight will be clear

I hate tornadoes. HATE them.

They scare me more than sharks, spiders, alligators, guns, and a bad boss. And all those things are pretty scary.

As I sat in my hallway today, holding my pillow like it was my lover, I checked the weather. It promised clear skies tonight. Awesome. I thought. If I can survive the storm, then I am golden. Guess what? Pretty sure, I did. I mean things could turn for the worse, but I think it's already done.

Like life really. If we can survive the storm, the worse days, clear skies are ahead.
I hold onto this hope.

yeah yeah yeah

in another life, I would be the girl who is covered in tattoos.
the one you, or at least I stare at, and wonder what they all mean

i would have purple hair. it goes best with my skin tone and looks killer with brown eyes
the light purple kind

i would have tons of money somehow while writing poetry and owning a coffee shop

i would drink coffee by the tons. good coffee with no cream. no sugar.
i would provide all the sweetness i would need in life

i would find a man who had good taste in music, hard to come by...

and i would live by the sea and go sailing on the weekends
without getting seasick
fish
but the fish would never feel the pain of dying
i have heard they don't anyways.

i would love with all my heart every good person
and bad people would not exist.

the feel factor

I reminded myself last night that it is okay to be hurt. It is okay to experience pain fully and it is actually healthy! To ignore the fact that life can be painful actually can bring more pain.

Pretending not to be broken does not make you less broken. Looking at your own bloody heart, even out of force, ushers in light. Then...you move on. Guess what? Life always moves. Time waits for no man.

So even in my brokenness, there is the Sun.  The Sun is always faithful in it's rising.

hands up, kids

I went to Disney World with my brothers a couple weeks ago. My 6 year old brother, who I was worried over, would throw his hands up on the roller coasters. At his age, I was screaming tearfully while probably peeing myself.

Nope, not Jonathan. He was all teeth grinned, embracing every moment. He wanted to do most rides again.

I want to be like this in life. I want to not live my life in fear. I want to throw my hands up with mouth wide open in pure exhilaration. Let's do this thing called life again...not because it was done wrong, but because we enjoyed the ride.

(oh and listening to Birdy-"People help the People"- personal favorite)